[ Simply. Simple as that. There's nothing else to it because Marcoh doesn't make a habit out of hiding behind few words on purpose; he just uses the least amount of words possible sometimes, and this is one of them.
There are parts where he certainly disagreed about it but he can't rebuke it when Jiaoqiu puts it like that. He may not be able to see it all too well right now, but Marcoh's despondent expression melts just a little -- tired. Just pure tiredness. ]
[ He knows his, so-to-speak limits here. He's just laid down, not even really cleaned off after execution, hasn't really even redressed much since Thursday evening (don't worry he did take a shower by the end of the day later). Just blood and despondence, and that's kind of terrible vibes, he knows... ]
[ sometimes you deserve to nihility a little bit ok you can be luka ]
You don't need to be any sort of help.
I just don't want you to be alone if that isn't what you want. [ tail swish. ] Though perhaps I can at the very least bring you something to wipe your hands with...
[ For a second I was like WHO? ALIEN STAGE? LUCAS??? Before I remembered the fucking redhead is a Nihility for SOME reason. ]
Not really that I want to or don't want to be alone.
[ He won't chase anybody out but he isn't exactly seeking out companionship either. He's just counting down the seconds, minutes until it's tomorrow, when they said they'd all be back. He hasn't laid in this bed since last Saturday and certainly hadn't been on his own. A thought materialises.
How many days left? And it's crushing. Bereft of rage, he's just hurt. ]
[ he does understand that. just sort of not being able to care. a beat, and then: ]
I'll be right back.
[ and he'll head down the hallway to get a clean towel and wet it. he thinks at the very least making sure that his hands aren't covered in blood might... help a little. he wanders back into the room carefully, trying not to run into things, and then: ]
[ It really does feel like when a dog actually lets you do things to its paws without kicking or suddenly biting. Damn what would it be like to have beans... ]
...
[ Sooner, and then after, too. Too fast. But he doesn't say anything else, just lets Jiaoqiu wipe his hands off. ]
[ i can't decide if it'd be annoying or not to have beans...
anyway, as he's cleaning: ]
I will be sad to leave all of you.
[ he's been thinking about it a lot - there's a brief flicker of basilio when he says it, sorry... but he thinks maybe marcoh might be thinking about not having enough time too. ]
[ He is. And it's a definitely not-insignificant portion of why he was so insanely mad. Obviously the cruelty of the murder only made it about a thousand times worse. ]
[ Because as far as he knows, there isn't one. He has to go back for Venere. And he knows Uruha also won't come back with him, because he literally asked. It sets a bad nervousness in his gut, knowing what he knows, what's waiting for him back home if he leaves, but he can't convince him to abandon it. Duty as a big brother, duty as a soldier and a friend.
Rage kept him functioning in a different way. With it gone, he only feels an awful hollow left behind where things settle and fester. ]
[ his ears pin back, as he finishes one hand - moves to the next. ]
I'm not sure. I don't have an answer for you, as much as I want to give us both one. [ sometimes, two people care desperately about the other, but - it's only been a few weeks. jiaoqiu would not and could not abandon his life and home and people for someone he's only known a few weeks, it doesn't matter how much he loves him. he knows it's the same for basilio.
a deep breath. ]
Gamaliel said that perhaps there is some way that one of us could figure out how to find each other again in our own worlds, but I'm afraid that is not good enough.
[ he can't just hope, like that. it's not how he works. ]
[ Marcoh always knew that'd be the deal, but as the weeks went on, he realised even though he knew it from the start, that he wasn't actually okay with it after all. He hasn't said it to him because he thinks it'd put more pressure on Uruha than not, feed the underlying guilt between them worse than ever, but he loves the guy. Without the necrotic flames of rage to obscure it, the only thing he's got left here is heartbreak. ]
...I don't know what that means.
[ Honestly. What, like they'd be brought, just a version of them to their own worlds...? That is different. ]
[ Oh. Worldhop... Marcoh, ICly, hadn't considered such but I OOCly have and even then I'm still like :bunsweat: can anything undoom this yaoi. Lord help. ]
Oh. Like stepping through dimensions.
[ For some ungodly reason Marcoh might actually be vaguely more familiar with this than Jiaoqiu but not in the sense that he understands it, more in the sense that he has learned it's a whole thing. His brows furrow vaguely. ]
If they could bring us here to begin with, then I guess...
[ But he hasn't much hope, considering just what Uruha's big old nerd duty is. Marcoh, if he can make sure his sister is safe first, is fine with that but... ]
Mm. [ he finishes with marcoh's other hand, and then eases back. ] The god that runs things here said it is not possible to do for us. I would not rely on them for any solution.
[ and, in a bitter thought: useless. ]
But I promised Taair that I would find a way for him to see other worlds, and I intend to fulfill it.
[ and he wants to see basilio again, but he won't bring his own yaoi into the mix, so. ]
[ he's a little surprised about it - but he doesn't pull away, just rests his hand there, ears pinned back against his skull still.
also no!! he's shy. and he thinks it seems like it'd be a little rude to be like oh yeah i'd also miss my boyfriend when his didn't die... but he is thinking about basilio here, and that's clear. ]
I appreciate it. [ genuinely. ] The angels, for as much as I care for them, cannot help but try and protect their god's delicate feelings, so if there is any solution to be found, it will have to be our responsibility.
[ ok damn chill ]
Perhaps, when all of us are together again, we can discuss it.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ Simply. Simple as that. There's nothing else to it because Marcoh doesn't make a habit out of hiding behind few words on purpose; he just uses the least amount of words possible sometimes, and this is one of them.
There are parts where he certainly disagreed about it but he can't rebuke it when Jiaoqiu puts it like that. He may not be able to see it all too well right now, but Marcoh's despondent expression melts just a little -- tired. Just pure tiredness. ]
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after a moment: ]
I suppose that's all I wanted to say. I can leave you to it, if you'd like to be alone. Or I can stay and we don't need to talk. Whatever you'd like.
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I'm not going to be much help.
[ He knows his, so-to-speak limits here. He's just laid down, not even really cleaned off after execution, hasn't really even redressed much since Thursday evening (don't worry he did take a shower by the end of the day later). Just blood and despondence, and that's kind of terrible vibes, he knows... ]
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You don't need to be any sort of help.
I just don't want you to be alone if that isn't what you want. [ tail swish. ] Though perhaps I can at the very least bring you something to wipe your hands with...
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Not really that I want to or don't want to be alone.
[ He won't chase anybody out but he isn't exactly seeking out companionship either. He's just counting down the seconds, minutes until it's tomorrow, when they said they'd all be back. He hasn't laid in this bed since last Saturday and certainly hadn't been on his own. A thought materialises.
How many days left? And it's crushing. Bereft of rage, he's just hurt. ]
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Mm.
[ he does understand that. just sort of not being able to care. a beat, and then: ]
I'll be right back.
[ and he'll head down the hallway to get a clean towel and wet it. he thinks at the very least making sure that his hands aren't covered in blood might... help a little. he wanders back into the room carefully, trying not to run into things, and then: ]
... We still have a week left.
[ softer, as he crouches near the bed. ]
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It might be busy.
[ The EntityTM is pissed, lets be real. ]
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[ give hand so he can clean, please. ]
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They won't be back until tomorrow.
[ Or so he was told. ]
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That's right. It'll be tomorrow, and I believe the angels. But it'll be sooner than you think.
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...
[ Sooner, and then after, too. Too fast. But he doesn't say anything else, just lets Jiaoqiu wipe his hands off. ]
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anyway, as he's cleaning: ]
I will be sad to leave all of you.
[ he's been thinking about it a lot - there's a brief flicker of basilio when he says it, sorry... but he thinks maybe marcoh might be thinking about not having enough time too. ]
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I will too.
[ Venere. He doesn't have a choice. ]
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It is... difficult, to think about the end. [ ... ] We are not there yet. Perhaps there will be a way.
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[ Because as far as he knows, there isn't one. He has to go back for Venere. And he knows Uruha also won't come back with him, because he literally asked. It sets a bad nervousness in his gut, knowing what he knows, what's waiting for him back home if he leaves, but he can't convince him to abandon it. Duty as a big brother, duty as a soldier and a friend.
Rage kept him functioning in a different way. With it gone, he only feels an awful hollow left behind where things settle and fester. ]
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I'm not sure. I don't have an answer for you, as much as I want to give us both one. [ sometimes, two people care desperately about the other, but - it's only been a few weeks. jiaoqiu would not and could not abandon his life and home and people for someone he's only known a few weeks, it doesn't matter how much he loves him. he knows it's the same for basilio.
a deep breath. ]
Gamaliel said that perhaps there is some way that one of us could figure out how to find each other again in our own worlds, but I'm afraid that is not good enough.
[ he can't just hope, like that. it's not how he works. ]
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...I don't know what that means.
[ Honestly. What, like they'd be brought, just a version of them to their own worlds...? That is different. ]
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Ah, she said that surely one of us has technology or magic in our own worlds that could make it possible to find a way to other dimensions.
[ she basically said y'all can do world hop yourselves when you get home because god won't do it. ]
I intend to ask the Astral Express when I return, but I don't like the uncertainty. I've never heard of anything like this before.
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Oh. Like stepping through dimensions.
[ For some ungodly reason Marcoh might actually be vaguely more familiar with this than Jiaoqiu but not in the sense that he understands it, more in the sense that he has learned it's a whole thing. His brows furrow vaguely. ]
If they could bring us here to begin with, then I guess...
[ But he hasn't much hope, considering just what Uruha's big old nerd duty is. Marcoh, if he can make sure his sister is safe first, is fine with that but... ]
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Mm. [ he finishes with marcoh's other hand, and then eases back. ] The god that runs things here said it is not possible to do for us. I would not rely on them for any solution.
[ and, in a bitter thought: useless. ]
But I promised Taair that I would find a way for him to see other worlds, and I intend to fulfill it.
[ and he wants to see basilio again, but he won't bring his own yaoi into the mix, so. ]
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Damn bitch bring your yaoi to the mix Marcoh's is just fucking out here for everyone to see. ]
...Don't know if I can really do anything to help there, but if there is.
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also no!! he's shy. and he thinks it seems like it'd be a little rude to be like oh yeah i'd also miss my boyfriend when his didn't die... but he is thinking about basilio here, and that's clear. ]
I appreciate it. [ genuinely. ] The angels, for as much as I care for them, cannot help but try and protect their god's delicate feelings, so if there is any solution to be found, it will have to be our responsibility.
[ ok damn chill ]
Perhaps, when all of us are together again, we can discuss it.
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Okay.
[ Sounds good to him and he hasn't got any other offers. ]
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pats him. ]
... Rest, for a while. I'll bring you food a little later, if you'll please eat it.
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[ Alright. Lets go of him for now then. ]